Noah Freeman, Reporter
Soft, suckle, and 18 years old. Some might remember me as a blazing racist, but only on the stage. My acting career was as good as my journalism career — haha. I gotcha! I am a good actor. I spent eight years under the floor of the Opstad theatre — the Midwest epicenter of the arts — where I taught myself the fundamentals of journalism, but only the ones I care about. That’s right, truth and justice are dull tools in my eyes — another joke, because my eyes don’t work. Ask my optometrist. Sometime during the month of February I misplaced my appendix. If you find it, let me know. Thanks. Kisses. XOXO. Lobster Boy ;)